Becoming What You Might Have Been

"It is never too late to become what you might have been." -- George Eliot

You probably know that Grandma Moses started painting at 80, but did you also know that Frank Lloyd Wright designed the Guggenheim Museumat 91, Gandhi successfully completed  egotiations for India's independence from Britain at age 77, Helen Keller was 75 when she  published her book honoring her teacher Anne Sullivan and Dame Agatha Christie was 84 when she oversaw the production of the movie “Murder on the Orient Express” based on her novel.  The moral, of course, is that age is what we make it and life isn’t over till it’s over. 

I have reached “a certain age” where some options have dropped away … I will never be the opera singer that I fantasized about being as a child (of course, age has little to do with that untaken path) and I will never have the thirteen children that I thought would be fun after reading “Cheaper by the Dozen” and deciding to one-up them.  But there is still time left to follow my curiosities, to become a more compassionate citizen of the world, to write a novel and observe my world through photography.

Perhaps the sweetest thing about exploring alternative paths at mid-life is the freedom from world-determined expectations of success.  Mid-life artists don’t have to cater to the whims of critics or the public, mid-life novelists can joyfully experience an imaginary world without worrying about publication, and mid-life compassion can be shared with one child without feeling responsible for changing the world.  We can learn things for the sheer joy of learning, make stuff for the joy of creation and become whatever we want to be without worrying about getting a grade, passing muster or winning an award.

I have recently discovered that I can incorporate my photography into my work in a way that makes me very happy and seems to connect with others.  Is there better photography in the world?  By far!  Could I find stock photos that would be far better than mine?  Absolutely.  But, using my own creative expression in my work feels more real, more connected, more like a gift to the world.  While I would never be able to sell my photography, I can find great pleasure in giving it away.

So, if it’s never too late to become what you might have been, what is that you wanted to be but haven’t yet become?  What did you dream of being as a child?  What other path still calls to you?  And, more importantly what are you doing to allow it into your life today?

We’d love to hear your stories about how you’re exploring your alternative paths and nurturing the self that might have been. Please comment below.

Comments

[nataldias]

You may not become the professional opera singer you would like to become but I've just been to an excellent performance of Aida which was performed by all all amateur company

[Rhonni Nightingale]

In my mid-thirties I discovered a passion and talent for songwriting. Now, at 51, I have just produced and recorded my first CD of songs and am performing a one-woman musical based on those songs. It is great fun and I can see myself not ever retiring, but continuing to create. Most people are surprised when I tell them I'm in my fifties, so I think a passion for the art keeps me youthful.
Also, I agree with m's posting - sometimes we just need to adapt earlier dreams instead of giving them up entirely.

[m]

You may not become the professional opera singer you would like to become but I've just been to an excellent performance of Aida which was performed by all all amateur company - Edinburgh Grand Opera who has members of all ages. I've got a link to them at my blog.

[David Coe]

I was half way through writing my first screenplay (aged 44) when I came across gaping void and Hugh's sex and cash theory -it's spot on.

As you say - I don't feel any pressure for it to be a success - I'm enjoying the process and it's changed me a bit...